Happy Monday Loves,
So much today…just got back from a great weekend with my college “Pod Squad.” So Fun. Lots of Food for Thought there. We are returning to normal here in CO as we say goodbye to our masks and hello to beautiful faces again. I am really thinking deeply about the blog and where I am headed. And, I finally listened to the new Glennon podcast. Remember the Cheetah post? Well, Glennon is taking it up a notch!
A Little Background
When I was about 11 years old, my mother and I moved into a little house in town from my grandparents’ home in the country. Times were not easy and I was a bit of an anxious kid. My mother drove into the city 2 hours away to go to work. I can remember evenings pacing my living room at 13 years old petrified she would not come home. Crying. Begging God to let her come home. Fearful that she had been in a car accident. There were no cellphones. I had to just wait it out. Alone. She always came back, late; there was a huge relief and then I would do it all over again the next night.
My late teens until I got married were a lot less anxious. It was just me and no one else to worry about. Fast forward to getting married and having Eva. At first, it was a bit of anxiety. I remember on my honeymoon worried I had breast cancer (the lump was just a bone). Then I had Eva and the anxiety multiplied 100 fold. All of a sudden there was this being that I loved with everything I had. I loved Mr. Tony just as much but Mr. Tony was ok before me and could be ok after me. Not so with this little being. She needed me. I began self diagnosing every ache or pain I had as cancer and lived in fear of dying. One of our DO friends even asked me why I thought a healthy and strong woman such as myself could have cancer.
After years, I realized that I was hurting my family with my fear and anxiety. I knew I needed to make some changes. And, I did. My anxiety is bearable and after listening to Glennon’s first episode of We Can Do Hard Things, I am actually grateful for my anxiety.
We Can Do Hard Things
What?!? How can I be grateful for anxiety. Anxiety sucks. Well, it does. But after you listen to “Anxiety – is it just love holding its breath”, you may have a different perspective. Anxiety and Love. I love this person as much as I love this person – that life is as fragile and precarious as we think it is.” We can lose one another. Things could go wrong. It is not anxiety I need to fix – it is just what it is. Breautiful – brutal and beautiful. Those are just a few of the things Glennon says. There is no way I can do it justice. However, I left that podcast with the gratitude of knowing that my fear and anxiety could be as she says – related to the deep love that I am lucky enough to have for others. That is powerful.
Now, being grateful does not mean that is easy to live with it. It is not. Glennon talks about the burden of those who have to deal with us anxious people as the ones who have a tougher job. My Mr. Tony is a lot like Glennon’s Abby – he appreciates me so much of what I bring to the table in other ways that he deals with the my junk. Oh, and you know his first response now to my anxiety around my various self diagnoses? “Why don’t you make a doctor’s appointment – that usually makes you feel better.” The cancer and everything. And, it does. Among, other tools.
So, since we have to live with it, the best thing is to find out the best way to manage it gratefully. Glennon talks about some of the tools she uses:
- The Breath Box Method based on science.
- Activating Her Senses (See, Hear, Feel, etc.)
- Going to the What Is (present) vs. the What If (future).
Such great tools. Honestly though, only the breathing works for me. The What If vs. What Is – my amigdala just doesn’t fall for that. That is because we are all different. You know what helps me? Sleep. I just gotta take a nap and when I wake up, 9 times out of 10, I am in a different place. A better place to deal with my stuff. Sometimes, if I read, it helps as well. You know what though. That doesn’t work for others.
It kinda sucks, but you have to find what works for you! There is no magic formula; only your recipe. The great thing is we have people like Glennon who share their stories and their tools so that we might find a nugget to help ourselves find our Om. Your Om is like your Home – It is Personal to You!
The Bottom Line
We Can Do Hard Things is honest, raw and authentic. No ego. Oh, and the Pod Squad I mentioned earlier? Golden. I am 50/50 on listening to a full podcast.